A Plan

Does anyone plan ahead anymore?  If you were to pass tomorrow would your family be provided for?  Would you have a plan for how you would want your family taken care of?

In our family the two monarchs from both sides have severe health issues.  One suffers from a brain injury and the other from a lifetime disease that impairs mobility.  The men are the providers and the primary care takers of these women.  If something were to happen to either of the patriarchs is there a plan?  This is the discussion my significant other decided to have at 6am this morning

We both come from blue collar working families.  Neither one of our families were prepared.  When my mom had her accident her livelihood was taken.  She will never be able to go back to work.  My significant other’s father lost his retirement when the company he had worked for went belly up.  I think the very thought of such a thing happening to us would send Mr. Over Planning into a full blown anxiety attack. 

So, how does someone like me who plans for nothing and lives in the moment compensate for that lacking behavior?  Answer:  Cognitive thinking and classical conditioning.  There is no known cure.    

I think about planning for the future.  I want to retire, travel, spend time with my kids, and the other stuff in life.  However, the discipline it takes to put a plan in place and then stick to it fails me.  If you want something in life you can’t only dream about it you have to plan for it.  If I want to travel to England I don’t just hop on a plane and take off.  I need money, passport, a place to stay, etc.  The days of youth and spontaneity have come and gone.  I find that humorous.  When we are teenagers and don’t have a care in the world we want to hurry up and grow up.  I so wish that someone would have told me how fast it passes by.  I wish that someone would have taken the time to help me develop a plan. 

I think about that, right now, at this moment.  I never had anyone help me develop a plan for my life.  My parents used to say go to college but they never helped me figure out how to get there.  All they said is “do something with your life”.  I was 17 years old.  How in the hell was I supposed to know what to do with my life.  AHHHHHH...... the angels are singing in unison.  It only took me 18 years to come to that realization.

My co-worker says that he was a self starter.  His parents always encouraged him to go to college but he planned his path.  However, his sister didn’t have that drive and the parents had to help carry her along the way.  Who knows?   

A Simple Day

So simple this day was.  A little boy admiring his grandfather's work at lighting and blowing up fireworks.  It wasn’t even the fourth of July or New Year’s.  Just a random day during a routine visit.  My son and daughter do not have the joys of grandparents that live close by as I did as a child.  One set is 16 hours away and the other 12 hours.  The monarchs of the family both have health issues that makes travel for them difficult or impossible. 

My husband and I both have the joys of full time demanding jobs.  It leaves little time for spontaneous, hell, even planned out, romps across the country.  When we do get to “go home” five days gets two years worth of activity squeezed in.

When I was growing up my Great Grandparents lived “across” the garden.  They were my primary caretakers while mom worked and dad was off with the military somewhere.  Every day, after an hour plus ride on the big yellow cheese, I would make my way to my great grandmother’s kitchen.  There we were offered biscuits butter and sugar, little Debbie snacks, fresh strawberries out of the garden, or a variety of other bad for your teeth stuff. 

I think back to those moments sometimes and wish I could recapture them.  I wish I could get up at 6am, throw some clothes on, and run across that garden to see what the day would hold.  Magic.....

Blog Worthy ?

What makes something blog worthy?  A random thought, a station or position?  What makes one person's thoughts so much more interesting that it would bring about a blog, a following, fame or fortune?  For example, the lady who blogs about American Idol.  She was then brought onto a television network to provide commentary about American Idol.  What makes her opinion of Idol so much more important then others?  Is she educated in music theory, performance? Or has she just built up a following because enough random people came across her blog and said, "Ok, I like what she has to say, makes sense".  Let me follow her so I can see whats up?  If it were that easy everyone would blog, everyone would have a following, and everyone would benefit.  Hmmmm?

I get my best ideas riding in my car thinking randomly about different things?  This morning I am thinking about the girl off House Wives of New Jersey who says she wants to be Carrie from Sex and the City.  She wants an apartment, someone to buy her a car, and to finance her lifestyle.  Does this girl fail to realize that Carrie Bradshaw had a JOB!  A glamorous job in the minds of many! 

What makes me think of the girl from Jersey?  Don't know.

What else did I think about this morning?  I thought about how I am educated but not overly educated.  I thought about how in my household my thirteen year old still thinks Disney rules.  Thank god!  And how my six year old son knows all the words to "run tell that homeboy homeboy".  How my husband likes to talk in a jacked up English accent "Bollocks!" because of the Ramsey Nightmare Kitchen (?) show on Netflix.  We are definitely a unique group.

I have also been thinking about relationships and why we do the things that we do.  Why do some people choose to be confrontational and some people don't?  How it doesn't always have to be confrontation.  Just because two people have a discussion about their feelings or thoughts about a situation that transpired does not make it a confrontation. 

So, those are my thoughts.  Where will they go from here?